My name is Andreo Jab Buhay. I currently live in Las Vegas, NV. I've immigrated to the US a few years ago. in 1998, I walked the hallowed halls of the AS building as I finished my UPCAT exam and whispered to myself that one day, I will walk the same steps as a student of the Univerisity. I found myself in UP Los Banos a few months later, happily taking up a BA degree. Being a resident of Antipolo, I had an excuse to take GE courses in the summer in Dilliman. So to a certain degree, a promise to myself was met.
I am a professional now in Las Vegas. Working full time as a marketing consultant during the day, on weekends as a photographer for the Little White Chapel and every so often, taking up freelance photography jobs in and around town. I had a discussion a few weeks ago, with a contemporary from UP, about why I try to keep three jobs all at the same time, when I'm already in the US. Of course the explanation was far more than a simple sentence - it was deeper than that. The discussion and theories went on for a few more hours (we were chatting on Yahoo Messenger). We've discussed several social adjustments Filipinos had to undertake as we move and live in other countries. We really did not resolve anything that time.
During President Aquino's oath taking, I had felt a sense of pride and hope as I saw it live on the Filipino Chanel. My mother and her american husband was watching it with us. I personally, do not know what the protocol is, but when the National Anthem was played, I stood up and placed my hand on my chest and sang. The sense of pride and hope, Im sure was shared by many other Filipinos world wide. It reminded me of that November 2008 night, when I was ironing my clothes, while watching CNN when they officially declared Barrack Obama the president of the United States.
A few weeks after President Noys oath taking, I took an oath as well. I was sworn in, together with 64 other individuals as new American Citizens. I felt torn inside Prof. David. I felt like I was turning my back on the country whom I've shed so much tears for. The homeland whom I have so much dreams for. I had to take an oath and denounce any allegiance with my motherland. You are probably asking now, why I did it. It's because I have a girlfriend, a fiancee waiting there in Manila. I want her to come here, and this is the fastest way for us to get it done. Machiavellian as it may sound, that's my reason.
My girlfriend and I have plan of one day coming back home and creating cooperatives for farmers and fishermen. That one day, we will be able to help the urban poor by convincing them to move back to the provinces to run their own business through our coop, provide them with a home and education for their children. Our dream is that one day, we will make a difference, one family at a time.
I do plan to come home one day, Prof. David. I want to be a farmer - wake up early in the morning, sipping my home grown coffee, feeding the chickens and fattening my pigs in the backyard. I want to sleep in a kulambo, with the evening wind through the ventanillas caressing me to sleep. I want to wake up to the warmth and wetness of the morning and enjoy the peaceful countryside dawn.
I've been following your articles sporadically for the past ten years - I've always hesitated to write you a personal letter. I am doing this now because of my torn feelings. I feel like I've betrayed my beliefs and everything I had raised my left fist on during my years in UP. How does a man chose between his pride and the things he must do? How does a man get torn between two flags because of need and want. I am sure I am not alone in the world with this situation, but what is the right thing to do? What is the right thing to feel? I hope this finds you well Dr. David. Thank you for your time.
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Jab Buhay
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